Wednesday, April 7, 2010


My mom Darla is 50. She is the most wonderful person. You know, I call her for everything. I call her when I'm mad, and you know what she tells me? She tells me to be Christlike in all I do.

I call her because I'm sick. You know what she tells me? She tells me I need to take a bath with Epsom salts and Lavender Oil.

But then I tell her I can't because I don't have a tub.
Happy birthday Mom.

Don't kill me for putting these pictures up.

Hannah my sister, made a post, but she didn't tell how old you are.

Well I will shout it from the rooftops.

My mom is 50, and she stays at home all day.

She reads any book she wants, goes to the spa once a week, has a maid that makes meals, and puts all her kids in daycare, so she can have a break.

 My mom is a miracle worker. She never has time for herself, she has 8 kids at home, 6 married kids, 2 with their own kids, 5 granddaughters, one on the way, 4 kids in college, one kid engaged, 4 under the age of eight, none in diapers!!!!!!, 2 in high school, 2 in junior high, 3 in grade school, one at home who is 2. And one who is severely autistic. Most the time when I call her our calls always end with this phrase "Ammon!! Don't!!! Stop it!!!! Sorry I gotta go Ammon is __________fill in the blank."

But he is a whole nother story. But my mom does it. Some how she does it.

I guess when you look at the numbers its pretty remarkable. 

The stats don't lie.

16 kids.

8 girls.
8 boys. 
(Be reasonable and pretend I am not in this picture.)

 So all of her kids...we turned out okay.

(minus Brad in this picture :) Hes the groom and not a spawn of Darla)

So my mom is incredible. And for her birthday I spiced up her style a little bit. 
I bought her a cardigan (black) with an off white under blouse that had a ribbed collar wide neck. Gorgeous mom. Looks like you are in your 20s again!

But then again, in your 20s you had 5 kids.

Let's look at those numbers for a sec.

She was just barely 19 when she got married. 9 months later in Jan she had Brooke. Still 19. Then shortly after the following March she had Tosha, 20 with 2 kids. Let's speed this up. Hannah a year and a half later 22, 3 kids. (Thats why I am behind, I should have 3 kids about now). 25, 5 kids. 27, 6 kids. 29, 8/9 kids. 30-35 11 kids. 35-40 13 kids. 40-45 15 kids 45-48 16 kids.

So there is the timeline you need to follow if you were planning on 16 kids. Let me know if you need any other counseling or meds. Cuz my mom is CRAZY LADY. But you know, she did it, and when she had 12 kids, we would always say, hey mom are you gonna have more? And she would reply with, "Not today."

So it was a surprise for all of us.

So Mom, happy birthday.

And I love you more than you will ever ever know.

I can't wait to call you to ask you what I should do when my baby won't stop crying.

Or better yet, to call you when I'm pregnant.

I can't wait for you to have a boy in the family of grandkids, I'm hoping my eggs will provide that boy for you.

Anyway, this post is about my mom. And she is an incredibly woman.

Not to mention a gorgeous one at that.

I just wish I had her waist size when she was 21.
Love you Mama!

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