Ammon and Autism

My sister wrote this great paper on Ammon. I doubt she cares if I post it. I laughed while reading it, because it is all so true.

Enjoy the autistic side of the Hansen family.

My younger brother Ammon was born on November 16, 1999. He was 9 pounds 15 ounces and was perfectly healthy. Two days later, he received, without my parents’ knowledge, a hepatitis B immunization. This immunization was entirely unnecessary but because my parents did not specifically say they did not want him to have it, the doctors gave it to him. Nine months later, Ammon was diagnosed with severe autism. We believe the hepatitis B shot was a major contributing factor to Ammon’s diagnosis, and we have been dealing with the effects of it, and autism, for nine years since. A concrete language barrier and severe behavioral problems are just two of the frustrating results of autism that we must deal with on a daily basis.

Because of the severity of Ammon’s autism, he does not speak. He can say words, but he cannot, or rather will not, formulate words into sentences that can be understood. Occasionally if prompted he will say, “I want sleep” or “I want drink” but many times he does not really want what he says and is just saying those things out of habit. We know he knows what he wants, but for some reason he cannot express it. This leads to terrible tantrums which are frustrating to witness because we, as his family, feel helpless as we hear him scream and watch him bite his hands because he is so angry.

When he is not upset, he is often making weird noises, sometimes very repetitively, or acting very strange because we cannot communicate to him what is and is not “socially acceptable.” For example, if he sees someone with something he wants, he will just go and try to take it. His lack of social skills makes it difficult to take him anywhere in public because he can be very disruptive and many people do not understand his condition. When we do take him places, we can always feel the eyes of everyone around staring awkwardly or giving us dirty looks.

Another reason we cannot take him places is because he frequently runs away. We live in a rural place surrounded by fields and dirt roads and he loves to explore, but he obviously does not tell anyone when he is leaving or where he is going. If we do not keep a constant watch on him, he will disappear and we will have no idea which direction he has gone. When the weather is warm, he will sometimes run away four or five times a day and hours are spent searching for him. The fear this ignites in us is agonizing because there are ponds, creeks, mountain lions, and many other dangers that could quickly harm Ammon. Taking Ammon to the city is just as scary. On one occasion we were at my brother’s house in Provo and Ammon ran away when we were not looking. We all spread out to search and we found him across the street in someone’s house. He had just opened the front door and gone right in. Luckily in this instance there were not cars on the road he crossed, but if there had been, Ammon would not have paid any attention to them. He is oblivious to danger and in turn we always have to be on our toes.

Preventing Ammon from running away is not the only time we have to be on our toes. Ammon’s nickname is “The Master of Destruction.” For some reason we have yet to figure out, Ammon loves to destroy things. He goes through different stages of destruction and no matter what we do to try to prevent him from ruining things, he always finds a way. Sometimes he gets into a “dump things” stage. This is a very messy stage for us, but for some reason he finds it enjoyable to dump whatever he can get his hands on. Bottles of vanilla, syrup, or shampoo are a few of his favorite things to dump. One time he dumped a whole gallon of Dawn soap down the tub drain on the third floor which caused bubbles to flow freely from the toilets on the first floor. Another time he dumped a whole container of Lawry’s seasoning salt into the pancake mix, which my dad then used to make pancakes for breakfast the next morning. Without knowing there was something wrong and ignoring the pleas of the kids, he tried to force us to eat the pancakes. We then made him taste them, he relented, and the pancakes were thrown away.

Another one of Ammon’s favorite stages is his “cutting stage.” During this stage we have to hide every pair of scissors that we own because if Ammon finds them he will use them. His favorite things to cut are sheets, VHS tapes, pictures, and important papers. He seems to always cut our homework or my mom’s paper work even where there are hundreds of unimportant papers lying around. One time during a “cutting stage” he cut the sewing machine cord when it was plugged into the wall. My mom found the pieces of the cord lying next to a pair of charred scissors that had a chunk of metal missing from each blade. He has not cut a cord since then. These incidents are minor, relatively inexpensive, and occasionally humorous, but many of Ammon’s destructive escapades are exactly opposite.

Ammon seems to enjoy spending time in vehicles and damage usually occurs. One time he was in our van during a “cutting stage” and he cut four of the seatbelts. Another time he was left unattended in our suburban and he pulled it into drive. The suburban smashed in to our van, leaving sizable dents in both vehicles. The most expensive damage report so far occurred when my older brother left Ammon alone in the truck one day after school. He pulled the truck into drive and the truck smashed into the side of the school. The truck had a heavy duty bumper on the front so it was fine, but the school received a few hundred dollars worth of damage that my parents had to pay for.

Having Ammon is an adventure. The language barrier and the behavioral problems are a challenging part of Ammon’s autism, but as his family we try to be optimistic by finding as much humor as we can in the things he does. Still, we try to advise as many people as we can to steer clear of immunizations if they want to avoid autism and its effects.

Here is a link to my meet the siblings about Ammon.

http://brittanyhansen.blogspot.com/2008/08/if-you-dont-think-he-is-handsome.html

Here Kitty Kitty

Brad and I love travelling together.
Brad loves it when I talk and he just sings along to his Steve Miller Band.

Then he loves it when we can make it to Standrod in less than 3 hours.


He likes it when I sleep the whole way.
Oh he loves that part. For the first time in my life I stayed awake the whole way back. Give me credit for that. We talked about all sorts of things. How I went to Peru, where we would have been if we would have just never met each other, how we would move to Standrod if the economy decided to give out and how our car was almost out of gas.

On the way home I just wanted to go back. Really bad.

There are so many things to absorb and spend hours doing, with no time restraints, no limits.

When I got there my camera battery was dead so I didn't get pictures of us going up the mountain and picking pine cones off of pine trees. Why does a human want pine cones? Oh my gosh, did you know pine nuts come out of pine cones?

You know those little whiteish yellow thingys that are soft and crisp at the same time? You need them, you want them, and you roast them. You roast the pine cones then pick out those seeds and eat em. So good.

They have a hard shell on them, which I just bite into and peel off. Then the meat. So, Amanda has all those pictures. Pictures of Brad on the front of the four wheeler, Shad driving. Lad behind him, me behind Lad, and Ian and Amanda on the back of the fourwheeler. PRiceless.

Its hunting season so as we were going up the mountain some old ladies in a camper yelled, "SLOW DOWN" at us. Oh I thought the speed limit was 10 mph, not 2 mph, sorry grumpy lady that is forced to go hunting with her husband.

My camera got charged later, and so Sunday I captured some unforgettable moments. But... I guess it didn't capture how bad I wanted to stay in Standrod. Nor did it capture how much I love a big shower, a big kitchen, a spider free bed, a sister as an alarm clock, a Ward where everybody knows me and cares about me, A 15 passenger van with 17 passengers, a dirt road that is so bumpy that Lad can't draw and he gets mad and keeps saying, "Its too bumpy, I can't draw!" Then Ethan keeps saying, "Just wait till we get home."

Brad says its chaos. He fits in well though. He doesn't complain and just goes along with whatever is happening. He is really nice too. That makes my siblings sometimes take advantage of him.

Like Faith, she is the best at that. She gets Brad to hold her, and sit by her while she plays with her play kitchen, feeding everybody. I was making gravy from the roast leftovers and Faith would not stop yelling, "Brinneeey come sit down by me, come on, just for a mineeite, it be fun, come on please."

She would repeat herself fifty times, then I finally just can't take ignoring her anymore and I say, "How about Brad sits by you?" That satisfies her but probably bores Brad to death. After Brad was sitting there by her, following her every kitchen demand, (you know as the 2 year old cook she can demand that Brad eat the plastic salad with a hamburger bun on it) I saw Brad lie down. On the floor instead of sitting up. She said, "No sit up Bwad. Sit up." He said, "No, I'm just gonna sit like this for a while."

Now I know Brad didn't know I was watching, but I think little Faith wears him out. Later in the day, she was chasing one of our bigger kitties trying to wash her with an empty 1 gallon gas can.

So Brad my dearest, you aren't the only one.



Oh wow, we found the Kitties. Kittys? Whatever. WE found em. My mom said the mama kitty moved them and she didn't know where.

Then we found them. Or someone found them.
My favorite quote of the day was when my mom told me to put some food out for her on the patio. She said there is a bowl out there.

My dad gave her a look. Because he doesn't like food to be put on the patio, then if it spills, it gets all over....anyway he doesn't like it.

So my dad gave her that look, like you know you shouldn't put a bowl out there for her to eat right there.

Then my mom said, "She is nursing 7 kitties. I'm NOT making her walk clear out to the orchard to get her food."

Later we found out that her kitties are in the orchard,so really my mom was making her walk all the way to the patio. Ha, nice one mama.

My mom and this kitty are similar.

Produced lots of babies, and lasted a long time.

And really chill.

They were in the wood pile.
When we found the kitties, we were mawling them. Picking them up cooing at them, holding them tight to our bodies, and mama kitty was concerned, but she was relaxed. She trusted us. We feed her.

There was only 2 white ones. The rest were gray like their mama. I told Brad to give me a light smile. The kitty, didn't really get it.I told them to look in the distance. Brad thought I said, to look at each other. He didn't catch it.
Then I told them to show their teeth. They both got it. Finally, we get some synchronized responses here.
Little runt kitty didn't really know what to expect of these humans, runt kitty just opened his eyes a week ago, all he knows is sleep, suck on mama, and play in the woodpile with 6 fellow kitty siblings. We all were intrigued by these kitties in the wood pile. I just wanted to kiss these kitties, but sadly I am madly allergic. Sadly and madly allergic.

As you can see, the little horsey of Landon's just couldn't leave us be. I sat down on the wood pile, and Mr. Horsey ate my hair. He just wanted to be by us. He liked the attention he was getting. He liked the kitties. They were cute, or thats what he whispered in my ear as he was trying to eat my shirt since my hair was too whispy and had too much product in it.

Pick her up Brad. Show us how cute she is. Dont worry, I don't know what is stuck on Brad's face. Probably barbecue sauce from the roast we just ate. Maybe the kitty can lick it off.
Mama kitty needs to put on some weight. All these babies are sucking her skinny.


She finally went back inside her cavern of a wood pile and fell asleep while we played with the four kittys who weren't tired.

Gotta hand it to her though, nice choice of a home this wood pile, sure attraction for mice to come in and snuggle then to find a mama kitty lookin for a treat for her drooling mouth, protection from the rain, protection from humans, and protection from cars and lawnmowers.

Mama kitty, just keep your babies out of the car engine fan. Cutting April's head off in the engine fan wasn't pretty. April was a good kitty. So good that Faith named all the kitties April cuz she misses April.

She said, "Oh! Here's baby April!!"

I thought, oh gosh, Faith knows April is gone, and is mourning inside, and to deal with it she is naming this kitties April.

How sweet.

Then Brad talked me into playing football. With all boys.

Don't worry, Lad only cried 8 times, and Chandler twice.

I cried once.

Joke.

Baby Sophie makes me want a cute cuddly thing for myself.

I bet Amanda wasn't aware of how Faith could interpret Sophie as Soapy.

"Oh look its baby Soapy!"-Faith.

It makes Sophie that much cuter.

Present

So due to errors, go to the bottom of the blog to do this:
Click on the pages to turn them. Sorry too small to read.....

And to see the wedding present book.

This is my wedding present to Brad.

I gave it to him yesterday.

Or more like he saw a package by the door. Opened it..then realized it was a book but it had a picture of me and him on it. So he was scared that he did something wrong. He texted me this.

"Something bad happened when I got home."

So when I read that. I freak out.

Freak out like, Oh great he dumped the garbage all over the kitchen and didnt have time to clean it up so he left it, and I will have to clean it up.

Or freak out like, oh great his old girlfriend showed up on his doorstep and he had to let her in and in the process of letting her in she set fire to our apartment.

But I guess I freak out too much.

And I ALWAYS think the worst.

Because something bad happened...really means...I opened something.

I jump to conclusions, like a cat pouncing on a moving ball of yarn thinking it is a mouse.

I'm hectic in my head.

But it all worked out. No garbage all over my house, no burned down house from broken hearted Lucy lovin Brad.

All he did was open it, and feel bad, and get all scared and try to think of solutions.

He told me his solutions were....

to lie and shove it back in the box, then act surprised.

to pretend he didn't open it, someone else must have.

to burn it and pretend like it didn't come at all.

to pour laundry detergent all over the box and say that it was wet so he had to open it.

But instead he told me what he did.

Which was fine.

I knew it would come and he may be the first one there and open it.

But he loved it.

No he adored it.

Don't worry if you didn't get your husband a book like this for his wedding, or don't worry if you don't have a husband, you are still awesome. I just like doing things like this, and may or may not 'look' for opportunities to do things like this.

Maybe I'm abnormal.

Regardless, I made him this book.

History of the Book:
61 days before we got married I thought of this idea. I wish I would have started it way before, but alas I did not think of it so I had to deal with 61 days.

Every day before we got married I wrote something. About our day, what we did, how I was feeling, what I was wearing, what I had to do that day, my fears, my joys, my everything. But the great thing is...I wrote them all to Brad.

So it said Dear Brad:
Blah blah blah.

I think my favorite is when I would write something to help me remember what I did that day so I could go back later and write what I did.

So I wrote 61 days before we got married. Each day saying 54 days left!! Then the date.

Then my day. Or whatever I felt like typing.

I keep getting new pieces of gum. On my third in 20 minutes.

Its a disorder I have.

Gumidious.

Back to the book.

Brad loved it. He didn't quite make it through, because I type too much.

But he did read the last part where I wrote about our wedding day...

I have it listed on private on bookemon.com, but if you are desperate to read it let me know.

But that has to mean that you are just crazy because its all gushy and lovey dovey.

But if you like that stuff.

Some days its not though. Some days it wasn't happy lovey dovey.

Maybe that is what you want.

Either way, I created this flip book for you to look through.

I highly recommend the site.

So beautiful.

The book was hard cover, so easy to do whatever I wanted to it, and they charge by page, not by pictures, or anything else. So it was brilliant.

I will use this site again when I need to make a book for my students or something.

I loved it!

And the best part is, its online always, so if I lose my book, or if I ruin it. I can just order another one.

Its better than any other website I have used.

Enough advertising for bookemon.

They should pay me.

Or give me books free for the rest of my life.

You can click on the little booky above and see our book.

Anyway.

I love it.

Its like a journal in a different form.

I also am tackling school, two jobs and husband.

Just be aware, that I do not really cook that much.

Unless I go crazy and cook a million things in one night.

Then I feel refreshed and I made up for my lack of cooking.

All my sentences keep getting longer and longer by the minute.

Creating a perfect stair on my blog, just what I need to be cool.

K I am done creating the stair. Back to cooking.

And life.

One good thing about school and working so much, is that when I get home at 10 at night....I love seeing Mr. Clark.

We get all exciting and I jump hug him.

Jump hug is you know when you hug then jump up.

You can only do it once you are married......cuz its provocative.

But I did it before we were married.

Whoops.

My favorites...

In the event that I was married 86 days ago. I just got around to posting my pictures on Facebook. But better yet. Im still married! And happily!!



Brad's mom has this cat.




It makes me allergic.







My throat gets all itchy. And I sneeze and itch my eyes endlessly. We go to his mom's house on Sunday's and usually the sneezing, itching and coughing is over by the time I shower when I get home. I make Brad shower too, or I wouldn't be able to be near him. Don't know what it is about this cat. When I was little I could hold cats till the early morn.




One time I was playing in a field wearing one of my favorite dresses. I had our calico cat above me as I layed on the ground. I remember staring her in the face and holding her below her front legs around the torso. I let go of her then she diareeeeahed all over my dress. Grossy. I didn't even notice till I got back to the house because it was so dark outside. So if I have that memory of holding a cat, and not even being that grossed out about her diareeeeeeeeeeeha then I must not have been that allergic to the dang things earlier in my life.



So, today I am still sneezing itching coughing feeling like I can't breathe. And I didn't put commas in between those because I feel like one big disaster. Just like that sentence feels without commas. It's a comparision that you cannot understand unless I don't use commas. Anyway, you get the jist.





What did I do last week? Holy schmoolleey. I think I did a lot. Let's start with my 100 percent score on my Social Studies Test.







First time ever the screen on the testing center posting the scores has given me any response besides a score. It said 100% PERFECT SCORE!!


Yes. Yes yes yes yes yes yes yes.


I got PERFECT SCORE!! Before I got, GOOD JOB next to a 91% or EXCELLENT next to a 98%, or a YOU REALLY SUCK next to a 45%, or DROP OUT NOW next to a 39%!!! yikeseesy.
So that was Saturday, right after Brad's flag football game where his team murdered the other team, and Brad got some amazing flag football plays that confirmed his skills. I had a choice to go take the test or play soccer. And I kept trying to go play soccer, then I just decided to get that feeling out of my gut and take the test.



Good choice.


Well I'll stop being conceited and facetious.




After my test we drove up to Midway with Sally. We took up 6 boxes of pizza for the fam. Our car still smells like pizza. I ate 9 pieces. Or more. It is now hanging over my jeans on the sides. Remi and Faith are so happy together. Except 99% of the time, when they are fighting.



I tried to teach Remi how to play games on the internet. I kept calling the mouse the mouse. And that was a bad idea, whenever I said mouse she would get distracted and say, Where??? So I resorted to saying, put your hand on this thing and click. That turned into way too long of a sentence for a two year old and she just clicked everywhere.


So it wasn't completely a disaster, but let's work on some fine motor skills then try again.

Speaking of a disaster. All three teams Brad (and I because I support my husband) cheers for lost. BYU, TEXAS TECH, and then....Dallas Cowboys.

I kissed him on the cheek and whispered in his ear, "Football isn't everything."


He said back to me out loud, "Of course I want to make dimple faced babies with you"

Just kidding he didn't say that.

And maybe that was too PG-13.

Okay...I just joined Twitter, and trust me....its awesome. I just don't know why yet.


I have two followers.


Help me.

brittanyhclark


Back to reality where my kitchen smokes us out when we cook tortillas.


And reality where more than two people in my apartment is a crowd.

Reality where we have only one car, a broken scooter, a dead lexus, and a flat tire beach cruiser with no brakes.

Reality where Brad has fifteen bajillion years of school left.

Reality where teaching pays enough for two to live.

Reality where my toenails don't paint themselves.

Reality where I still haven't sent out Thank You Cards.


I won't let this be a graduation failure.

Where I didn't send out any but wrote them all.


Wow.

I'm crazy bad.

We got a card in the mail recently from Brad's great aunt.
She sent a check for the wedding, then a seperate check for Brad's graduation.


She took five years, so I can take five right?

We loved the late gift.


So people will love the 86 days late thank you cards right?


I hope so.


Someone told me I had a year.

Hopefully I hit that deadline.


Fbook has my pics.


I thought I would share with you my favorites...and why.



And right about here you are thinking....who cares.


Boring.

Just like Brad yelled at his student teachers in the middle of class in high school.



I love this one. Love it because my dress is so pretty. And we are sitting on the temple. Sitting on it. And kissing. Kissing on the temple. When I look at it, I think of class, and love, and real life situations. Like sit down with me honey so we can watch our kids play in this basketball game.

Oh look! Our kids! Just kidding. These are the adorable boys I was a nanny for in the wonderful 4 month summer of 2007 in El Paso, Texas. Reid is far left, he was grumpy due to hitting his head on the temple earlier. Trevor in my lap and Bryce far right. I love these boys like they are my own. They came all the way from El Paso. And I almost cried when I saw them waiting for me to come out the temple doors. They were two then, they are four now!! Gosh I miss them daily.

I love this one because I love my sisters. I don't have a plethora of girly friends because I have all these gems to call, help me, and cry to. Well I guess Brad kinda replaced them for the cry to thingy, but mostly my sisters are my examples, best friends, and mentors.

This is how we felt after we got married. Lets run away and get this wedding junk over with. I loved every minute of the wedding junk. Even if my arms hurt from hugging peoples.

This was after it started to rain on the temple grounds. Rain and pour. And I love how celebrity we look with all the retro lights. Thats why I love this one. And you can't see Brad's body.

I love this one because of the dramatic sky before it began to pour. This is real folks. Hopefully its not a foreshadowing of things to come. Ahahahaha Im hilarious. No but really it is gorgeous.

I love love love this one. Its not your typical standard oh coming out of the temple picture. It sorta throws you off, and EverYONE has out their cameras. I love how all the people I love the most are there surrounding us.

This was taken right after all the family pictures got done. My parents have one EXACTLY like this in this exact spot. I love it. I love how time flies. I love how my parents were such a good example to me, an example to get married in the temple. An example of family, and support.

It was raining outside, and the temple shadow is subtle but always in our lives and relationship. In reality, this picture is simple but gorgeous. Rain=life is hard sometimes, but we can get through it. Temple=Eternal life is our goal, and our eternal marriage is a symbol of that. Kiss=we will forever love each other and continually strive to work through the rain, and make it to the temple. :)

Oh I love this one, because Brad's friends were such a constant part of our relationship. They are such a huge part of his life, and such a huge part of his standards. I love all of his friends. Don't mind Luke (big guy holding me) he didn't know what he was grabbing.

I love this picture because Brad has so many sisters now! He has 9 sister in laws on my side instead of just 2 sisters. So he gained a lot, and a lot of love! Also, he is very much loved by my sisters, and at times I was worried Echo was going to steal him from me.

I love this one, because its cute. That's all. Reminds me of Mary Poppins.

And this one, I love Brad's face. Not that I don't love his face in other ones. But he looks so handsome here. So natural. No forced smile, no off guard look, no wierd lips, just perfectly him.

These are all my siblings, with none included. So that's why I love this one. Its my heart, my base, my existance, with my new heart, my new base, and my new existance placed inside of my life. Brad.

Holiness to the Lord. Classy, and makes me want to reach out and grab the knob. Feel the designs. I love it. Next time I go, Im going to walk up on that step and touch it.

Laughing. We are laughing. Most likely Brad said, Im itching all over throw me off this balcony.

Brothers. I have 8 lovely adorable, matching brothers. Who could ask for a better protection system. Good thing they approved of Brad.

All my bridesmaids. Brad's mom made all their skirts. If she ever agrees to anything like that again, I'm sure she would die.

THis was the day before my wedding, and Brooke fabricated this beautiful boquet. I loved it and I loved the colors.

This was taken AFTER we were married. And I love how into me Brad is. How embraced he is with my face. He loves me. And I love him. And Im going to blow this picture up and hang it all over my house someday.

The end.

Swiss Me.

Well two weekends ago Tosha had a booth at Swiss Days. So I skipped my Friday classes, got work off on Thursday, Friday, and Saturday and Brad and I ventured up to Swissy Days.





We stayed Thursday night, and Friday night, then I had to be back at work on Saturday at sixPM.

I played with Remi and Faith. I told them we should go look at the stars.
I told them to tell stories.
Remi had Noooo problem with that.
For she is the storytelling two year old of the century.

I left them out there for a minute....
They rushed back in yelling, "Brinnetyyyy"

I decided that either I was out there with them....or they were going to come in due to their fear of monsters in the dark. Monsters with legs that can run faster than a two year old. Otherwise they would stay out there, but they knew they couldn't run faster than the monsters in Midway.

I worked in the makeup booth till my feet bled. I also bought some nice things.




Brad bought some ties.



I bought a zebra watercolor by this guy who is talented. I love it.

Together we bought 6 sandwiches, 2 scones, and drinks.


Thursday I swear to you I had sun stroke.



I took a bath in Tosha's tub.




Brad wants a piano, so in order to get one we need to move. In order to move the new place has to have a bathtub. In order to move we will have to spend more money.




So it wont happen. We are both making sacrifices.




I almost bought a macbook pro the other day.






Then I realized I needed to be conservative.

Then Brad's wireless card in his computer gave out.



Now we wish we had that macbook pro.




I dream about it. I dream about the desktop, and all the folders I could have on there, organizing all my teaching folders.




Its all a dream.





Back to swiss days.


Hannah came up from AZ, and all of us sisters were together. There is eight of us.

I tried to turn to minimize my wideness and get the side view, as I believe that is better than straight on. But it turned out to be a half sideways and half straight on pic. I lost, and the camera always wins. Always adds 30 million pounds. I look better when Im moving. Thats my new motto.

But yes, we are sisters. We all have the same smile. Exact. I know what my children's smiles are going to be like.

I also know what their noses are going to look like....

Freckled.

How do I know you ask??????

Well this face here has a few freckles. 95,067,890 to be exact. And my baby will be a mix of this person and me.

My baby doesn't stand a chance.

We went to Stake Conference on Sunday. I was so distracted by all the movement and talking, coughing, and babies.

I said, "Brad, I know what I want for Christmas now."

He said, "What my darlingest wife ever in the universe."

I pointed to a baby in pink and said, "That."

"Okay, I'll put one in a box, except it will be in blue....is that okay." Brad

"Fine. A boy." Me

The conversation died and I continued to stare at the tiny teeny legs and toes, and dreamed of painting my freckled baby's little toenails.

So you know how many spiritual notes I took during that meeting.

Thats right.

None.

Oh we worked in the booth, and my sister Hannah decided to capture our labors.

Brad spent most of the days listening to the music.

I told you he was addicted to guitars.

By guitars I mean everything that has strings and makes sounds, or has buttons you push that make sounds. So he sat in the shade in the bleachers for hours, while I put makeup on wrinkly faces and promised them it made them look better. One lady just pulled back all her wrinkles and stared in the mirror, then sighed..."I wish I didn't have these."

I really felt bad for her. I don't want wrinkles. I don't want them. After putting makeup on 59 million old ladies...I decided that. And now I fear them.

I'll use anti wrinkle cream, till Im broke, then I'll just wear a paper bag over my head.

So that display picture is of me. Only 2 people realized it. Maybe its because I looked chubbier in the picture from what Sally told me. We sold so much makeup. One lady just would buy anything I told her. That was a 168.00 purchase for her. Cha Ching for me.

After this extravaganza of fun Brad and I spent our labor day Monday at the Utah Lake.

It was full of speedos, canned beverages and fun.

At one point all the boys were standing on the back of the boat. Then the driver decided to throw them all off. That turned into this. Try to hold on to the back of the boat while the boat is going a million mph.

Brad rocked the surfing thing.

I am pretty happy just watching and taking pictures.

We were sunburned after this day. I had random white patches where I attempted to give myself sunblock.

Oh and for your video enjoyment..... Brad and his skills.

Should have edited out where he just drifts away and sinks...but come on now, we gotta have real life situations right?

Real life situations like failures.

Failures happen :)

Good job Bradley.

Good surfing honey face.

No sleep headache.

Welcome to the world of college.

Welcome to the world of senior semester.

When Brad and I were dating, we would stay up so late. Or so early. Rarely did I get home before 4 AM let alone midnight. I know, bad. But we like each other. Still do, if you were wondering.

We would stay up so late, then we both had class or work at 8AM. The first time it happened I went through about a week of what I called the 'no sleep headache'. Then overtime your body adjusts to sleeping 30 minutes several times throughout the day, instead of at night, for eight hours. Then the no sleep headache slowly fades.

School came back. I never thought I would experience a no sleep headache again. Then school came back.

Now I am experiencing daily no sleep headaches.

School started on the 31st of August.

Its the eleventh.

I am totally doomed. Hardest part is yet to come I'm sure.

I try to fit in naps. I try to make it work. But sometimes when I have class 8-2, work from 2-9pm....its hard.

Then I have a husband.

Oh that husband.

And I feel like since school has started I never see that husband of mine.

We both had intramural flag football games last night.

My team brutally lost.

His team won. Killed the other team.

But our games were at the same time.

So I didn't see my husband.

We got snowies after.

Those were yummy.

Sally came.

She's nice and muscular.

I dont know where I was going with this post.

Maybe that I stay up late doing homework.

Stay up all day schooling and working.

Then . . . other stuff.

I wanted to tell stories.

But I forgot them.

Now all I can remember is how my teachers have been swearing lately.

My science teacher is a nice older lady who said she told her kids once to stop bitchin'

YIKES!!!
She kept saying it.

Then...she just blushed and blushed.

And she tried to explain that that word that I said up there was common 20 years ago. Or however many years ago she said it. She said, it was kinda bad, but not a swear swear like it is now.

Oh so she blushed forever, and kept fanning her face.

But, then....today...our classroom's technology was not functioning so we moved to another empty room.

Then this roode roooooooode rude guy came in and said, uh, I have a class in two minutes in here. So leave.

"Uh, okay, well our stuff wasnt working....so we moved in here."-My professor.

"Okay well I have a class so you need to ."-Rooooddy face guy

"Okay."-My nice professor who sings Three Dog Night songs to us.

After the rude guy shut the door my professor said, "Smart Ass."

Oh gosh.

I love my professors.

Sorry this blog post is so vulgar.

It just reminded me of how I played in my flag football game last night and I dove and killed my body for a flag and barely missed the dang thing. Then I said that d word really loud.

Thats why I reminded myself of it.

Sorry if you are a swearing fanatic of righteousness.

I never swear.

Unless its my fault the other team just scored a touchdown.

But I realized that everyone makes mistakes right.......

I'll work on my d words.

But if I had to pick a favorite, that would be it. The d word.

Gosh Im off topic...
sorry.

Operator retreat is tomorrow. We meet all the operators up there and we just do fun stuff. Teach them about being operators.

We leave at 7:30AM.

I was going to drive them...but my license expired...and apparently the DRIVERS LICENSE people arent open on fridays. . .

Apparently I didn't think of that.

I want to work for the Drivers License division.
So I dont have to work on Fridays.

I could like teach those people who get tickets how to drive.

Like Brad had to go to.

Oh ya, traffic school.

A day after his bday he got a ticket.

Officer: Sorry you are getting a ticket on your birthday.
Brad: Oh its fine, I'll just remember your name and burn your cat tonight.

Back to the point.

I'm tired.

And I have so much homeworky I cant see anything but ink on my planner pages.

But I love it.

Every day I know I am in the right major. I know I am going to love teaching, and being a baby student teacher in the classrooms, like I am now.

Baby student teacher.

Lesson plans.

Integration.

Core curriculum.

All these words mean nothing to you.

But to me they mean everything.

I still like Brad.

Maybe even love him more than I did last time I posted.

Maybe because he listens through my stressed out breakdowns.

Maybe because he doesn't take me TOO seriously when I say I am going to drop out and quit this is way too hard.

But I think its normal for people to cry in their senior semester...

Is it?

Regardless.

I love school.

Yahoo for school.

And Brad is now learning Elvis Presley songs.

Those just hit me right there in the heart and pull the strings.

Probably because my dad loves them, my family loves them, I grew up with Elvis.

'Can't help falling in love with you' is his latest.

He likes to change the lyrics due to his lack of memorization of them.

Like a river 'goes' (really its flows, gosh Brad, learn your Elvis)

Surely I can be......wait Brad its supposed to be Surely to the sea...

"whatever"-Brad

I haven't cooked him food in weeks.

I told him this semester was going to be hard and he might have to do everything.

So far I have been pretty right about that statement.

He does the dishes.

He makes his own food. Unless I have two minutes and I will throw together a sandwich for him.

And he makes the bed.

Jk, we dont make the bed.

He takes out the garbage.

Yesterday I cleaned the sink.

I thought that was a lot. I barely had time to, and Brad was saying, "come on lets go lets go"

The entire time.

I just needed to feel wifey for a minute.

Wifey cleany.

Havent felt like that lately.

Havent felt much of anything lately.

Just getting force fed information.. . . .

And sleeping.

But Im happy, and thank goodness I have a Guitar Husband that sings "cant help falling in love with you" even when Im not really producing much of anything for him to be like, oh that Brittany she is just so great. She makes me dinner, and washes my clothes, mops the floor.....and other wife stuff...
But regardless I just fall in love with him right back.

I love sushi, but I cant make it myself or I get grossed out.

Random fact: Brad gave me socks that said, you're cute on them. For Christmas. We had been dating one month and a half.

He's nice.

What it is like.

Sometimes I worry that I will forget what college is like.

Forget the diversity and the absence of caring about being popular like we did in high school.

One thing is for sure. . .

Just because you are in college doesn't mean you are the smartest.

I was in class looking down at my syllabus after we had just had an animal activity to demonstrate teaching children about life science and all the sudden I heard the teacher say, "Yes, go ahead."
The girl who was raising her hand asked in a clueless voice, that voice came from the table across the room.
"Are rabbits and raccoons rodents? Because they aren't mammals."-Girl that is a senior. We are two semesters away from graduating.

With that in mind.

There is always the people who speak out. Speak out and correct the teacher. And know every answer. And some.

I am in a GE class.

History 202

I dreaded it. But I think it was meant to be because my professor is ideal. I was already thinking in my head how I am going to give him great marks on the semester review. Great ones. Because he made me laugh a million times. By saying everything in a sarcastic creative way. And by just being awesome.

But you know what Im talking about, those people who raise their hand at the first and know all the questions the professor asks on the first day of class that you dont even care to answer nor do you have any idea where the country even is on the map let alone who is trying to take over it...

and of course he knows that answer.

And of course he expounds so that the teacher and every other 88 persons in the room know that he is just by dang the smartest ever.

I counted after 5 comments.

He made 7 more.

But only on the first 2 did he raise his hand.

Then he blurted them out. Because the professor stopped calling on him.

The professor asked if the UN decided that US should give back all the states that we 'took' from mexico, what would happen....

Of course everyone was quiet, it was supposed to be a thinking dramatic question.

Then Mr. He who sits on the front three rows in the middle blurts out, "Well at least I wouldn't have to try to get my girlfriend a visa to come here, she would just come here....because UTAH would be Mexican Territory."

Oh perfect. Now I can pretty much map out your whole life with that comment. The 88 people who heard that are embarrassed. But we all should of known this class wouldn't have been complete without you Mr. Mexican Girlfriend.

He made other ridiculous analogies that made me grateful I am out of high school so when he becomes a teacher he will NEVER teach me. Just hope he doesn't teach my children, or your children.

On a happier note. FHE happened yesterday. It usually starts with Brad or I finding some religious material in our house and splitting it up and taking time to read it, then taking time to talk about it.

From past FHEs Brad learned he need to give me a time limit to my sharing part.

So I read my part out of the financial booklet our Bishop or someone like unto that gave to us.

And Brad read his.

He was sitting on the couch, and I on the floor rug.

Oh newsflash, we got a couch, its green and pleatherish. And small. Brad and I on it at the same time trying to be comfortable...doesn't normally happen. Hence my floor residing.

I had Brad share first.

Because usually I don't listen if I share first and I am just bored by then. And if I shared first he would just say, "K that was good enough, closing prayer."

Then came my turn.

As I went on about how I wanted to teach our kids about finances and on and on.
Brad made comments at first.

Then they died off.

Then I realized I was losing my spouse.

I was losing his attention.

Wow, Im a sucky teacher.

"Is my three minutes up?"-Brit
"Uh, probably, but its okay, but ya..."-Brad
"Oh, uh okay I'll stop."-Brit
"Oh you are okay."-Brad
"No I'll really stop, Ive gone on forever."-Brit

Now that classes are here. Now that class is in front of my face and I am going to be student teaching in four months. . . I am worried about my teaching skills.

Im worried about my creativity level.

Im worried about my classroom.

Will I paint my bookshelves?

Will I have enough books?

Will they like me?

Oh gosh.

Can I even plan a million lesson plans a day?

Is that even possible?

Sunday I made bread.

Zucchini bread.

The recipe was nice and fun.

Brad did this as I made it.



Oh looky looky! Its our couch!!!! And Addicted Guitar Man.

He usually sings songs pertaining to the day. Or what I am doing.

They go like so....

*NOTE this is just an example of what he could say...not saying he says these things..but alas, sometimes he does say these things.

"Britt NEY wont you come sit by ME
You are making ZucchinEEEE
...bread....
I want to kiss you on the nose.
Please don't make the bread be gross."

Usually to the tune of Banana Pancakes.

oh perfect. Zucchini Bread. New song. For Jack.

He needs to sing it.

Brad will write the lyrics.
The counter in our kitchen doesn't exist. Just this massive table that the owners at his work gave us.

Oh they gave us the microwave too. Mouse microwave.

So I use space.

On the table.

"Wow, we have no table now."-Brad
"Do you want zucchini bread?"-Brit

So its our only option :)


Eh sorry if this picture is grossy. Grossy grossy.

I wonder who decided to mix these two things together.

Oh yes, I know lets put this green VEGGIE in bread.

To make VEGGIE bread.

Oh yes yes, what a great splendid idea.

Well its controversially healthy.

Zucchini+6 cups of sugar= healthy

You may argue that. But you will lose. It is healthy.

As is anything with fruit in it.

Fruit ice cream.

Fruit pizza.

Fruit salad.

Its so all so healthy.

Eh...
I put chocolate chips in the bread. Not strategically. Not orderly. Just dumped them in the pan. And somehow Brad thought I was sweet for making his piece be a smily face of chocolate chips. Then I told him I didn't mean to. Then he got even more excited...

"Yes YEs YEs I'll eat the whole loaf, give none of this away, and I MEAN NONE OF IT"-Brad in an angry cackily voice touchy his fingertips together lightly.

I cut the loaf into segments so I could take some to his sister.

Thats why I dont have 3 perfect loaves here.





I just google searched 'dream kitchen' and found this picture. My favorite part are the streaks on the cupboards below the sink. Oh wait no...its the crooked wobbly coils on the stove top, oh gosh wait no its the paint streaks on the kitchen table that looks like someone just dumped a gallon of paint and tried to scrape it off the table. No, wait I love the placement of the blender, waffle iron, and fan on top of the microwave, all so innovative, all so dynamic.

Just kidding, its my kitchen.

Oh is that two lemon juices you see....yes yes it is.

Thats because Bradley. (He is the guy I married in June)...Bradley is on a cleanse.

He drinks water, lemon juice mixed with maple syrup and Cayenne pepper.

This was not my idea.

This was a challenge between him and his friend. Jeff.

I just support.

He is supposed to eat nor drink anything but this mixture, but they made a decision that they would eat ONLY FRUITS AND VEGGIES with it.

Its Tuesday. He started yesterday. He told me today, "I am sick of this food."

So.....its going well for him.

He eats grapes and mangos.

And cucumbers.

And carrots.

And strawberries.

And onions.

Very little potatoes.

We are stretchin.

But he feels better.

In the mean time I am scarfing down dove ice cream bars.

All this dieting makes me hungry.

Oh and we PAID for 5 intramural teams today.

Gosh.

5x30 equals 80 dollars.

But the teams will be funo.

Now I just have to juggle.

Juggle 2 jobs, 17 credits, a husband, an apartment, and now three intramural teams that I am on. Brad is on five.

What? How is that even possible?

So I will just juggle.

Priorities though.

First comes sleep. :)

JK, husband always wins that battle, cuz he has those dots all over his face called freckles.

Freckles always win.